Blog

Cover-up’s

I have found in my journey of grief that I create "cover-ups" Because the pain is so unbearable I have to use other things to take my mind off of Brianna, I noticed this when my Dad died, my grief switched to him and I focused everything on him, the days after his...

Getting out of Depression….My new journey

  It all started in October, I found out Kayla was moving to California, I went into an instant depression, I instantly cut all ties with everyone, I stopped exercising, I stopped doing things, I would get off work come home and do nothing, I had no motivation. I...

Running and Grief

I haven't written much about this.... And I should since it is such a big part of my Grief...I think we all have to find something to help us to focus. So many people are unable to focus and they stay in the dark for many years, for me that was not an option, I had to...

At 1:24 pm Miss Brianna Reid Canacari was Born

..... I awoke with a sobbing cry this morning..... I can't believe Brianna would be 16 today.... Most mornings when I wake up I have those first few minutes where I don't think about it, I am normal and my child is alive, and then it kicks in that yes my child is...

Changing of the Seasons

Changing of the season: It builds up without me even thinking about it, it starts just after Brianna's Angel day, the pressure building in my heart. I usually have about 3 months out of the year when I am "OK" the other 9 months are just plain Hell. And then when the...

Your identity after tragedy:

I am sure I am not the only one who feels this way, and especially a parent who has lost a child. We now have this "identity" the Mom who lost a child, the Grieving Mother, or that lady.... I have fought these last three years to not be stereotyped as any of those...

Seeing things through Brianna’s Eyes

The star of the football team has a blind Dad who always comes to his games, even though he can't see his son play. Well, one day he gets very sick and dies before the night of his big game. The team is expecting him to slack off, mourning the death of his Dad. But he...

Keeping it together.

Keeping it together: This school year came so fast.... I hadn’t actually thought about it. Maybe I didn’t want to, it’s to painful. Brianna would be starting High School!!! Shit I am missing out on so much. I know what she would have done, she would have wanted Kayla...

Sneak Peek to my Book- my Dedication

My Thoughts, my Thanks I wanted to thank everyone who has supported the Canacari Family these past Three years, thank you for the many that have came into our life, my dear friends (and you know who you are) who have been there every step of the way. There are so many...

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